A Blue State of Mind

"The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams." Oprah

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Location: The Western U.S, United States

I spent 48 years caring about what people thought of me. I'm not spending the rest of my life caring about that anymore!

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Thankful Thursday - Weather

During the last few weeks Phoenix and her surrounding areas has seen some wild weather! We've been hit with cold snaps that have damaged plants and made even the heartiest outdoors athlete choose an indoor gym rather than work outside in the elements.

I personally have enjoyed every cold, freezing, rainy and windy moment. My brother who lives in Boise, ID says I'm enjoying the weather because I know it's a fluke and will change within a few weeks. And to a large extent he's right. I understand, being a lifelong resident of the 602, that these weather fluctuations aren't normal and in just a few weeks we'll be in the low to mid-80's with bright sunshiney days.

So this Thursday, I'm thankful for having experienced great weather! And here's hoping that where ever you are, you're warm, healthy and satisfied.

Waiting to get to 37 degrees!

We never really got to the high of 52 that day

Loved this!

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

And So Here We Are

And so here we are with lives without Robin. I've not posted since his burial services because
a) I've had family in town for the funeral
b) I've not been depressed, just sad about the loss so my blogging mojo had waned

Here are a few pics of the military burial. This was my first time at a military burial so I didn't know what to expect. The dignity and dedication demonstrated by the personnel was outstanding. My cousin would have loved to have seen this.

Gun Salute! I wonder if they used real ammo?

The two elderly soldiers read beautiful poem and moving prayer

Mournful sound of Taps played by this soldier
The presentation of the flag. 

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Thankful Thursday - Family

I've shared many photos of my family on this blog, because as my friends and family know, family is all tome. Not too long ago, as I began to lose my close family and my parents, I thought my family was becoming smaller and the crowd was closing.  But now, I can see how my family is following the course of life, just as yours hopefully is;  the older generation is leaving and a new generation is coming up.  So, I'm caught between the sorrow of losing uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents and parents, but rejoicing at being able to bounce new nieces and cousins and nephews.  Oohing and awwing at their tiny hands and feet, wondering what they'll encounter in their life times, and how to make sure my relationships with their parents remain as close and tight knit as it was when I was the new generation.

This Thursday, and every day, I'm thankful for family.

Bean, pregnant with Emma


The new generation

The new generation

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

RIP Robin

My beloved cousin has died. He believed strongly in family and supporting his family whenever and however he could. Not a young man but certainly too soon to have left us.

Robin and his lovely wife Yvonne

Monday, January 07, 2013

Apartment 3-D, Where Are You?

Earlier this morning a thought ran through my mind: when was the last time I'd seen a comic strip? How could I have forgotten comic strips for such a long time, especially the importance they had in my father's and my daily life?

As long as I can remember, my father was a lover of the comic strip. Each evening, after he'd get home he'd sit and read the paper, finding the comics first, then reading the front page, the political page and wrapping up with the obituary page. The sports and entertainment pages were left unread and used for cleaning supplies or trash.

My father didn't learn to read very well until after we children entered elementary school.  I remember him taking night classes (because he made us attend too) to learn to read, and how proud he was after receiving his Reading Proficiency Certification. He was so proud and happy. We kids were too because that meant no more classes lolol!

Reading comics every night strengthened his skill and allowed him to understand what he had missed some forty years of his life. And soon I grew to love the comics too. I can remember them now:
Apartment 3G
Mrs. Worth
Beetle Bailey
Family Circus
Dennis the Menace
Little Orphan Annie (with the scary eyes)
Dick Tracey
There are others but I can't remember them right now, but remembering makes me miss Daddy.

Daddy and I weren't close during most of my adult life. We coexisted as peacefully as we could but that closeness was never there.  Reading the comics was one of the few common experiences we shared so as I remember and miss reading comics, I remember and miss my daddy.

Thursday, January 03, 2013

Sitting Here, Reflecting

All mental speeches will be positive!

2013 arrived at my house quietly.  Although surrounded by party revelers, firecrackers and a spattering of gun fire, it was an evening spent mentally preparing a list of things I want to happen in these upcoming twelve months, and yes, things I don't want to happen. Let me share my list with you:


1.  Increase my finances. I spent every dime I got my grubby chubby hands on last year. Well, not really everything, I didn't go into my cash reserve, but I cleaned out my savings on my travels, hosting my 50th birthday party, buying my gifts, making repairs to the house. This year I have to return to my frugal ways if I want to recoup what was not saved. 

2.  Increase my physical endurance. About two years ago I learned to swim and began a program of water aerobics which is energizing!  This year I want to be more physically active on terra firma, without risking injury to my already arthritic joints. I was contemplating hiring a personal trainer or checking to see if physical therapy is covered under preventive coverage. The kids have a Wii game called "Just Dance" that I've enjoyed playing. It's a disk that has different dances at different levels and some of the dances are low impact or can be done while sitting. So, I'm gonna start moving to the grooving. I'll let you know how it goes.

3.  Take classes. Specifically photography and to learn another language. Last year I went to Italy and Spain and again marveled at the number of people who are proficient in several languages while most of the Americans with me were reduced to sign language, pointing or using translator apps to communicate to the locals. I've been a lover of photography since before I can remember. Before I was in high school I carried a camera everywhere. And in high school I took several photography classes. So may as well have fun while I learn something new.

4.  More house repairs. From painting to new carpets, new flooring, new bedroom sets, new curtains, new showers, new towels, a garden, new flower pots etc. 


1.  Losing friends and family. Lord, my family needs a break. Death, two times last year, one month apart, is enough for a long time, don't You agree? So, I want a family reunion celebrating us, not a gathering to bury someone.

2.   Succumbing to negative thoughts and feelings. I've spent too many years mentally castrating myself for not being brave, for not losing weight, for not having children, for not completing my Master's degree, for not doing this, for not doing that. I'm 50 years old now. Middle-aged now. I've learned that all this negative history has not helped me grow, it has not incented me to change behaviours and it's retarded me. So this year, I'm done!  If it's not helping me, I'm not entertaining it. I don't want to be an old, bitter lady who looks back at her life and reflects only on what I didn't do.

So here is what I was thinking of New Years evening, before the bubbly was passed and before the Uno game got ugly.  Real ugly.
Taking charge and letting go!