Would You Ever Change Things?
I've been so busy this week. Each time I got a few moments of rest it was immediately followed by having something else to do. Finally I've some time to myself. Well, at least two more hours before I join the girls for our monthly dinner and catch up session.
While rushing to another meeting yesterday and being the first to arrive I started leafing through my daytimer looking at my remaining tasks and started thinking, "What if I hadn't taken this job seven years ago? Where would I be or what would I be doing?"
That stuck in my head for sometime, and even this morning I'm thinking, "How would life be if I had made different decisions or some of the major events in my life had happened?
So I made a game of it and here's my little "What If?" list that I'm sure most of us have made at some point in our lives.
What if I didn't wake up this morning? Who would be the first to discover my body? Would my mother have called me after walking into my room and touching my cold body? Who would she call first, the parametics or my family?
What if I had quit my job or had been laid off? Would I be working or still looking for a job?
What if I had moved to California when I had the opportunity 20 years ago? Would I still be there? Would I have a better job?
What if I had had the WLS in '91. Would I have been able to keep the weight off? Would I have married and had children? Would I still be so conservative if I were thin?
What if I hadn't graduated college? Would I have ever gone back and finished my degree?
What if I had married my ex-fiancee at 19? Would I have children? Would I be a grandmother by now?
What if that man had caught me walking home from high school? Would he have killed me?
What if that car had hit me while crossing the street? Would I have been killed or crippled?
What if, after drinking all that bleach I had died? Would my mother have carried that guilt w/her all of her life?
What if I had not been born?
posted by Debo Blue | Thursday, March 01, 2007
10 Comments:
"what if" you stopped scaring me with all those death scenarios???
"what if" you were thin but nobody read your blog because you weren't as beautiful as you are now?
in the immortal words of Arsenio Hall....... things that make you go "hhhhmmmmmmm"...
What a thought-provoking list, but...how depressing!
You drank bleach?
OK,,,,OK.... I popped in for a visit and I put you into my favorites file and I gave you a link. I must apologize for being remiss in my blogging duties. I am yours now. My thanks to you for being such a faithful reader. I grovel at your feet for forgiveness.
I have been reading your list here to see if I can come up with any ideas for new products. Perhaps a new accessory for Giddyup Uranus just might appear out of this. I assume you will want royalties.
Once again, Sorry and thanks
Later Y'all
And then there are all the other what if's. What if I hadn't been a good friend, and a friend had become despondent. What if I hadn't been a good daughter, and had caused my mother misery...I'll bet you could go on and on!
I'm not perfect in this regard to, but what I try to live up to is simply "no regrets." If I make a major decision, I hope that I will not look back and have too many regrets. I may be riddled with self doubt, but it isn't the variety of did I pick the wrong career, spouse, school, etc. As we get older life sometimes seems to be a series of doors we close behind us with every choice.
Well, enough philosophy.
The bleach episode must have been a tough time. Glad you made it through.
Perhaps the next question should be.... "What have I learned from the things that did happen in my life?"
"What if I had not been born?"...the world would be missing a great person...
Lots of love:)
M.
Gosh! My mouth is open w/awe! I'm humbled w/the comments.
Thanks everyone!
You know Debo, I'm so glad that some of the "what if's" you mentioned didn't happen to you - or to me! The fact we (all of us) make choices along life's way - some good, some -well maybe best to not revisit some of them ya know too - but it's those choices and how we played those cards out in the game that made us all who and what we now are. In some ways, perhaps the better, and in others, maybe not quite as good a we'd like things to be.
But, to your last "what if" -Deb, had you never been born, my world here would sure as heck be a lot bluer for the loss of never having had a chance to communicate with you! You bring a light with your posts, a wisdom, a strength, and impart so much to each and everyone who comes in contact with you in cyberspace and I'm betting the very same applies to those who cross paths with you in the "real" world too! And, when I have in the past - still do at times too - ask myself that very same question, I have to think, to tell myself, that had I NOT been around, there would never have been the three children or the three grandchildren who carry my genes either! And maybe, somewhere along the way, I managed to impact someone -hopefully in a positive way -that makes my having been here worthwhile there too!
You're one terrific lady!
Jeni-I'm overly humbled:-) Thank you!
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