Stop Bugging Me!
I hate bugs! Except for caterpillars and spiders, I am afraid of every bug. You'd think, being a desert baby with its plethora of bug and insect species, I'd be used to them by now. Not so, and my exterminator will attest to the amount of money I've spent over the years to help rid my home of bugs. I remember receiving a postcard from Disneyland thanking me for my bug phobia. I'm expecting to receive graduation invitations in a few years. But I digress.
Of all the bugs/insects I hate the most, crickets, roaches and cockroaches frighten me the most. Now on the reason for the post....
Tuesday morning started like any normal day. I awoke and enjoyed a leisurely cup of tea and read the newest Ebony magazine. Got in the shower and lathered myself up with my favourite bath soap (Caress). Everything's great, right? I turn around to get my awesome battery operated shower brush with the changing heads (you really should try one of these, especially if there's no one to wash your back for you) when I noticed a huge black CRICKET trying to crawl up the side of the tub!! I give a little yelp because I don't want to disturb Wooka and Momma, (and because I don't want to hear them laughing at me) and try to figure out how to get him out of the shower without him touching me. I move the shower curtain around to try and guide him toward the drain when I see the SECOND BLACK CRICKET!! This time I scream, tear open the curtain and high-tail it out of that shower in record fat girl time! Leaving a trail of soap lather.
So now I'm in a terrible predicament...there are two crickets in MY warm shower, I'm standing in an ever growing puddle of sudsy water and I have to rinse. So, I turn off the cold water and blast those bugs with boiling hot water and queasily watch them boil and go down the drain.
After I'm sure they won't be back up the drain I get back in the shower and try to rinse as quickly and as completely as is possible in tepid water.
Later I discover soap still behind my ears, my neck and other places I hadn't rinsed. I should have gone outside and rinsed with the water hose as cold as that water now was coming out of the shower.
The next time I showered I made sure there were no unwanted visitors to bug me while showering.
PS-I tried to use a picture of crickets but couldn't, they made me too squeamish!
posted by Debo Blue | Sunday, January 27, 2008
7 Comments:
Crickets are ugly! During the summer they set up camp under the garbage cans and scatter everywhere whenever I go to put the cans out. Makes me jump and makes my skin crawl.
I will confess though that I summon all my strength for anything in the house and try hard to just release them out the window. Thankfully there's a window in my shower so it's not a long, soapy, naked trip.
Sorry they ruined your relaxing shower.
Dianne-They ruined my shower and my day. Can you imagine how sticky I felt?
I'm sitting here chuckling over your comment about moving in "record fat girl time" cause I can sooooo relate to that! That would be me too, for sure. I hate bugs, any doggone kind of 'em! Right now, we once again are enjoying a very light infestation of the damned ladybugs. I know they are supposed to bring a house good luck but I'll take my chances without them, thank you very much! Granted, this year is not as heavy with them as it was about 3-4 years ago when they were absolutely crawling all over the darned place but I still want them to be gone, cease and desist! Daddy-long-legs though and occasionally other types of spiders seem to like our bathtub and when I see them there, I boil them and wash them down the tubes too!
Jeni-I don't mind ladybugs although we don't see enough out here to really care, and for some reason Daddy-long-legs love my restroom too. But spiders don't necessarily bother me unless they're crawling on me of course:-)
I have been bitten by a spider in the worst place for a big girl. I'll have to tell that story sometime:-)
I can understand the roach thing; but, Jeni, ladybugs? They are the cute kittens of the bug world. If you want to "off" them, they won't even know it till they are in bug heaven.
Aww Dave, you came to see me! I hope you're well.
"Ladybug, Ladybug fly away home. Your house is on fire and your children are gone!"
Anybody remeber jump-roping to that little diddy?
The last post we get hot phone sex. Now we have hot naked shower scenes.
This is getting good.
Whats next? Don't post it until I get Poot's next shipment.
LOL
Later Y'all.
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